This is a landmark case.
Barry Bonds indicted on perjury and obstruction charges goes well beyond baseball, steroids, and home run records. Oh, no. This is a far more compelling drama than a mere betting scandal or simple sports controversial, series-changing player suspension. This is a case where illegal drugs, America's hallowed historical past time, the American justice system, and hero-worship implicate every last living American in crimes against culture.
We are compelled to pay attention to this story because EVERYONE has an opinion about baseball. Whether revered for its tradition or reviled for its pace, everyone in America recognizes baseball as a cultural commonality. This is why everyone has an opinion about Barry Bonds. Even casual baseball fans, people whose only contact with the sport is the five minutes at the end of the ten o'clock news, "hate" Bonds and want to see him strung up because he (allegedly) cheated. He soiled the records.
Forget the fact that the second most hallowed record - the single-season home run mark - had already been the subject of controversy, not once, but twice before Barry Bonds came along in 2001. Forget the fact that Roger Maris hit his record-breaking 61st home run on the last day of a season eight games longer than Ruth's 60 home run seasons. And most importantly, forget the fact that three years prior, Maris' record was broken by a man now mired in this steroid controversy. That's not even mentioning Sammy Sosa.
EVERYBODY knows who Barry Bonds is. He's that jerk who charges kids for autographs and starts fights in the dug out. He's that arrogant bastard who plays solely for the money, despite his pedigree. He's the angry black man earning more in one year than his father and godfather combined earned in their entire careers, making up for past sins of the white man.
Real or not, that sums up the general perception of the reigning home run king. In mainstream terms, he is very easy to hate. Nothing like that OJ guy. So let's string him up.
This case points to celebrity and race, and it points to our cultural belief of the qualities that comprise a hero, whether that man is a baseball player, a football player, a supreme court justice, or a president. This is a case of a white justice system persecuting a prominent black athlete.
If Law and Order has taught me anything, it is that perjury and obstruction of justice are nothing more than prosecutorial knees to the groin. They are a last ditch effort to bring down an opponent who otherwise would not fall.
Bill Clinton was impeached for perjury, though he committed no other crime. Men with a lot to lose tend to lie about trivial things when put under pressure. This is a biological fact, easily verified by talking to any woman who has or has had a cheating boyfriend. Clinton did nothing worthy of losing office, despite the best efforts of a strong Republican contingent to prove otherwise. They couldn't get him thrown out for adultery or real estate scams, so they tried to get him for lying about it.
Unfortunately for Barry, he actually DID commit a crime. He broke a now 17 year old law intended "[t]o amend the Controlled Substances Act to provide criminal penalties for illicit use of anabolic steroids and for coaches and others who endeavor to persuade or induce athletes to take anabolic steroids, and for other purposes." At least, that's what the prosecution believes. They have a positive drug result from four years ago, and they've had it for four years.
So why now? Why let his trainer sit in jail for a year? Even the LAPD had a strong case filled with tons of incriminating evidence (the knife, the gloves, the shoddy alibi) before they went after OJ. A die-hard conspiracy theorist might say that Bud Selig was behind the delay. They decided to let everything play out knowing full well that Bonds was toast. Now the Steroid era gets to come to a nice clean end, and Selig doesn't have to answer questions as to why it happened in the first place. History can forget that he enabled the situation, if only it can be resolved on his watch in the most memorably spectacular courtroom drama.
Is Bonds really the fall guy for Bud Selig's Steroid era of baseball? Why not Mark McGwire or Sammy Sosa? Why not Ken Caminiti? Hell, why not Jose Canseco? Here's a guy who openly admits to using steroids, is hated by the general population, and is willing to talk. Why is Jose Canseco any less credible a patsy than a record holder, a retired player, a pathetic comeback player, and a dead guy?
Does it HAVE to be the black guy who speaks English?
I have no doubts that the NAACP and ACLU will use this as case study for any future indictments against prominent black men, even if they don't come to Barry's defense. He DID violate the sacred trust of our most hallowed of events. You can bet that ROE V. BARRY will ultimately be one of the cornerstone cases that people point to when looking for answers to grand ethical questions. It will be compared to cases involving girls with names like Monica, Anita, and Nicole, though there are no women involved here. Just men.
This is fascinating stuff. I can't wait to hear what Gloria Steinem has to say about this.
November 16, 2007
November 15, 2007
Fan Dance
At the risk of more bandwagon accusations, I feel I must comment on this whole "fan" issue making its way around the net and local talk radio. Unless you've been hanging by the wrists from iron shackles along a grimy Welsh granite dungeon wall for the past week, you have heard Mike D'Antoni's latest criticism of his "team."
I say "team" because he is essentially calling out a vital member of the Suns team that has yet to show up. Fans thought it would be the Matrix who didn't show up this season, and they hoped that Boris Diaw would (both beliefs proved unfounded in reality, so far), but it is they who haven't bothered to bring their energy to the game. They are the fans at America West Arena . . . I mean US Airways Center.
It all started innocently enough. After the Suns thoroughly dominated the Knicks without even trying on Tuesday night (a game that I thought was awesome in every way because Amare was kicking ass), Coach, for whatever reasons, turned his critical eye from the players and placed it squarely on the 18 thousand-some odd fans who are privileged enough to see the games live.
Almost daily a reporter from some paper or website from anywhere around the world asks him about his team's "sluggish start." His team is 6-2 with injury induced rotation shuffles. D'Antoni has been saying all along that the team isn't quite there yet - that they're still working out the on court chemistry with Grant Hill, getting him comfortable with his role. Amare has been in and out of the line up due to knee problems and a failed Wunderlich test, and now our designated 6th man is showing us why he should be in the starting line up instead of Raja Bell. The team is not anywhere near where it should be and will be in April, but the Suns are still winning. They've had conditioning issues in their two losses, both of which have come on the back end of a twin killing coming off a flight.
The team is 6-2! Where was the team after eight games the last TWO seasons? The Suns started 3-5 last year and 4-4 in the year without Amare. The last time the Suns started 6-2 was 2004, otherwise known as year one of the Nash era. And fans aren't excited. Not the ones who are fortunate enough to attend games, anyway. Remember, D'Antoni called out the crowds, not the general fan base. This was my first reaction:
The Suns arena crowd is more San Antonio than Oakland, or even Los Angeles. There have always been celebrities at Laker games, but why are they showing up at Suns games? Why are they drawing the yuppie Northeast Valley snobs instead of the people who absolutely love the team and would be standing up a full 48 minutes of regulation game time, letting our players know how much we appreciate them? When did Phoenix Suns basketball become The Bolshoi?
Perhaps the most inspiring scene of fan appreciation comes at the end of Major League, when the rag tag Indians rally from a run down in the bottom of the ninth for the division title. The die hard fans, the four guys sitting in the left field bleachers with the Tee Pee and the tom toms, the people who had supported the team, even as it bottomed out midseason were all there standing and cheering their team. They rode the roller coaster with their team, and this moment belonged as much to those fans as it did the players and manager. The fans had Municipal stadium rocking so hard that the quake began to spread.
The Japanese grounds crew, who to this point had only said in their native tongue throughout the entire movie, "They're still shitty," pounded their shovels on the ground. Punks and yuppies arm in arm, banging bottles and beer mugs on the bars in front of them sent the shock wave through bars and homes throughout the entire city of Cleveland. The fans united in one thunderous explosion of team worship, and it all started with the few who were there from the beginning.
That can't happen here because the yuppies cut in front of the real fans, and those Teleband wagoners need a televisible reason to have any kind of reaction. It's like they're sitting on set waiting for some "methical" director to yell, "ACTION!"
The Suns are winning early, and the players are doing things worthy of praise. Stop waiting around for a championship that may never come. You had Amare playing like a defensive demon with four blocks and 12 rebounds, not to mention the fact that he literally exploded for 26 points. You had Steve "MVP" Nash collecting 12 assists as his team mates made more than half their shots. You had Leandro Barbosa and Shawn Marion matching each other's point production, as well as collecting five steals between them. You had Brian Skinner grabbing 7 rebounds in 18 minutes, not to mention his two blocks and three steals. Piatkowski made his first three of the season, and Boris Diaw is playing some nice post defense. And you had Marcus Banks . . . well, I can't defend you every time Banks.
The point is, there was a ton of entertainment value in that game, despite any perceived lackadaisical play. So the Suns committed 19 turnovers. Big deal. They outrebounded the Knicks, and that should be plenty to cheer.
I don't believe that Suns fans are "anxious," as Dan Bickley suggests, "I believe a large majority of Suns fans need a serious dose of the two P's: patience and perspective."
I believe that a majority of Suns fans HAVE those two P's. They should have one more P for having to be lumped in with the ignorant fans at the game who feel that paying money is praise enough. They're like bad tippers. They go to the most expensive restaurant in town, receive the best service they will ever get in their lives, are treated as French Nobility, then question the 15% gratuity added to the bill. They have no appreciation for the experience, and the only time they make noise is when they have a complaint.
And Mike D'Antoni called them out. Good. There are plenty of other fans who will buy single game tickets when holders throw away their season tickets. The Suns need fans that understand that it's not about the money, it's about the once-in-a-lifetime experience of seeing the best team in the league play. The arena is a place for basketball fans - for Suns fans - not camera fans or "seen at the scene" fans.
A fan is a part of the team, not "a paying customer."
I say "team" because he is essentially calling out a vital member of the Suns team that has yet to show up. Fans thought it would be the Matrix who didn't show up this season, and they hoped that Boris Diaw would (both beliefs proved unfounded in reality, so far), but it is they who haven't bothered to bring their energy to the game. They are the fans at America West Arena . . . I mean US Airways Center.
It all started innocently enough. After the Suns thoroughly dominated the Knicks without even trying on Tuesday night (a game that I thought was awesome in every way because Amare was kicking ass), Coach, for whatever reasons, turned his critical eye from the players and placed it squarely on the 18 thousand-some odd fans who are privileged enough to see the games live.
Almost daily a reporter from some paper or website from anywhere around the world asks him about his team's "sluggish start." His team is 6-2 with injury induced rotation shuffles. D'Antoni has been saying all along that the team isn't quite there yet - that they're still working out the on court chemistry with Grant Hill, getting him comfortable with his role. Amare has been in and out of the line up due to knee problems and a failed Wunderlich test, and now our designated 6th man is showing us why he should be in the starting line up instead of Raja Bell. The team is not anywhere near where it should be and will be in April, but the Suns are still winning. They've had conditioning issues in their two losses, both of which have come on the back end of a twin killing coming off a flight.
The team is 6-2! Where was the team after eight games the last TWO seasons? The Suns started 3-5 last year and 4-4 in the year without Amare. The last time the Suns started 6-2 was 2004, otherwise known as year one of the Nash era. And fans aren't excited. Not the ones who are fortunate enough to attend games, anyway. Remember, D'Antoni called out the crowds, not the general fan base. This was my first reaction:
Season ticket holders act all bad like their the greatest Suns fans in the world just because they can fork down the thousands of dollars to get them, then they make the arena look like an opium den when the Suns are absolutely manhandling a busted down Knicks team. The LEAST those people should have done was boo Isiah Thomas incessantly for being a perennial black eye (no racial pun intended) on the entire freakin' league. Those people in the lower bowl should be forced to give up their tickets to real fans...those of us who would stand the entire game screaming for every rebound, every deflection, and every 24 second shot clock violation the Suns force. Too bad for our players that the REAL fans can't afford tickets to see their team play every other night.
The Suns arena crowd is more San Antonio than Oakland, or even Los Angeles. There have always been celebrities at Laker games, but why are they showing up at Suns games? Why are they drawing the yuppie Northeast Valley snobs instead of the people who absolutely love the team and would be standing up a full 48 minutes of regulation game time, letting our players know how much we appreciate them? When did Phoenix Suns basketball become The Bolshoi?
Perhaps the most inspiring scene of fan appreciation comes at the end of Major League, when the rag tag Indians rally from a run down in the bottom of the ninth for the division title. The die hard fans, the four guys sitting in the left field bleachers with the Tee Pee and the tom toms, the people who had supported the team, even as it bottomed out midseason were all there standing and cheering their team. They rode the roller coaster with their team, and this moment belonged as much to those fans as it did the players and manager. The fans had Municipal stadium rocking so hard that the quake began to spread.
The Japanese grounds crew, who to this point had only said in their native tongue throughout the entire movie, "They're still shitty," pounded their shovels on the ground. Punks and yuppies arm in arm, banging bottles and beer mugs on the bars in front of them sent the shock wave through bars and homes throughout the entire city of Cleveland. The fans united in one thunderous explosion of team worship, and it all started with the few who were there from the beginning.
That can't happen here because the yuppies cut in front of the real fans, and those Teleband wagoners need a televisible reason to have any kind of reaction. It's like they're sitting on set waiting for some "methical" director to yell, "ACTION!"
The Suns are winning early, and the players are doing things worthy of praise. Stop waiting around for a championship that may never come. You had Amare playing like a defensive demon with four blocks and 12 rebounds, not to mention the fact that he literally exploded for 26 points. You had Steve "MVP" Nash collecting 12 assists as his team mates made more than half their shots. You had Leandro Barbosa and Shawn Marion matching each other's point production, as well as collecting five steals between them. You had Brian Skinner grabbing 7 rebounds in 18 minutes, not to mention his two blocks and three steals. Piatkowski made his first three of the season, and Boris Diaw is playing some nice post defense. And you had Marcus Banks . . . well, I can't defend you every time Banks.
The point is, there was a ton of entertainment value in that game, despite any perceived lackadaisical play. So the Suns committed 19 turnovers. Big deal. They outrebounded the Knicks, and that should be plenty to cheer.
I don't believe that Suns fans are "anxious," as Dan Bickley suggests, "I believe a large majority of Suns fans need a serious dose of the two P's: patience and perspective."
I believe that a majority of Suns fans HAVE those two P's. They should have one more P for having to be lumped in with the ignorant fans at the game who feel that paying money is praise enough. They're like bad tippers. They go to the most expensive restaurant in town, receive the best service they will ever get in their lives, are treated as French Nobility, then question the 15% gratuity added to the bill. They have no appreciation for the experience, and the only time they make noise is when they have a complaint.
And Mike D'Antoni called them out. Good. There are plenty of other fans who will buy single game tickets when holders throw away their season tickets. The Suns need fans that understand that it's not about the money, it's about the once-in-a-lifetime experience of seeing the best team in the league play. The arena is a place for basketball fans - for Suns fans - not camera fans or "seen at the scene" fans.
A fan is a part of the team, not "a paying customer."
November 13, 2007
Crossing the Fourth Wall
OK, Suns fans, here's the deal. Some of you may have noticed that I've been neglecting my blog duties. As well, you message board patrons may note that I've been a little on edge lately. There's a good reason for it, and I felt it appropriate to share my epiphany with my readers.
Today was a good day. I got my insurance card (finally), the pigeon landed after a long holiday layover, the Death Star arrived, and azcentral's own Paul Coro spoke to me. Now, I wasn't sure why at the time, but upon reading my name in a column by PC made me smile and feel all warm and fuzzy inside. It felt surreal having someone speak directly to me through a professional blog on a corporate website, and then it hit me. Paul wasn't talking to me. He was talking to a person who really only exists online.
It seems that I've been having an identity crisis of sorts, lately, and that response opened my eyes to what is really going on around here. The person writing is not the same as the person speaking (ambiguity intentional). I can actually distance and dissociate myself from the "character" I present online, thus separating myself from the iconic "Jey" (which, by the way, is not my "real" name).
If certain people don't get it, so be it. I am not going to change the identity that I so carefully constructed for satirical use in favor of "political correctness" (by extension, the opportunity to work more professionally).
I've had my integrity questioned, my fanship challenged, my methods criticized, and my insanity "duly noted." And you know what? Fuck* you. The only reason anyone could ever get pissed off at anything I say . . . is that I speak the truth.
You don't like my method for expressing my criticisms? Too bad. Focus on the problem, and don't worry about my attitude. There is no reason that a professional journalist should be speaking directly to a message board personality through his own corporate blog. It is highly unethical, as it shows how much you are forming your work based on external influences. You should be writing objectively - you should not be letting external biases creep into your work. You have enough of your own to worry about.
You don't think I'm a good enough fan? Outdo me. I challenge you to do what I do every day to express my loyalty to the Suns. All any of you do is talk on a message board and write cheaply written first person pseudo-blogs. I put effort into my work. I educate myself in more areas of study for the purposes of informing and entertaining than any of you consider for your own careers. This is not just some dude with an opinion spouting off on the Internet. This is an artist perfecting his craft, and who can ever question that I've chosen the Suns as my canvas? When you've crawled in my skin for three days, then you can question and/or criticize me. Until then, keep your blindfolded cheer leading to your corner closets. I'm working here.
To those who enjoy and appreciate the things I do in the name of Solar Redemption, thank you for your continued support.
There is no Planet. There is only A Clockwork.
Today was a good day. I got my insurance card (finally), the pigeon landed after a long holiday layover, the Death Star arrived, and azcentral's own Paul Coro spoke to me. Now, I wasn't sure why at the time, but upon reading my name in a column by PC made me smile and feel all warm and fuzzy inside. It felt surreal having someone speak directly to me through a professional blog on a corporate website, and then it hit me. Paul wasn't talking to me. He was talking to a person who really only exists online.
It seems that I've been having an identity crisis of sorts, lately, and that response opened my eyes to what is really going on around here. The person writing is not the same as the person speaking (ambiguity intentional). I can actually distance and dissociate myself from the "character" I present online, thus separating myself from the iconic "Jey" (which, by the way, is not my "real" name).
If certain people don't get it, so be it. I am not going to change the identity that I so carefully constructed for satirical use in favor of "political correctness" (by extension, the opportunity to work more professionally).
I've had my integrity questioned, my fanship challenged, my methods criticized, and my insanity "duly noted." And you know what? Fuck* you. The only reason anyone could ever get pissed off at anything I say . . . is that I speak the truth.
You don't like my method for expressing my criticisms? Too bad. Focus on the problem, and don't worry about my attitude. There is no reason that a professional journalist should be speaking directly to a message board personality through his own corporate blog. It is highly unethical, as it shows how much you are forming your work based on external influences. You should be writing objectively - you should not be letting external biases creep into your work. You have enough of your own to worry about.
You don't think I'm a good enough fan? Outdo me. I challenge you to do what I do every day to express my loyalty to the Suns. All any of you do is talk on a message board and write cheaply written first person pseudo-blogs. I put effort into my work. I educate myself in more areas of study for the purposes of informing and entertaining than any of you consider for your own careers. This is not just some dude with an opinion spouting off on the Internet. This is an artist perfecting his craft, and who can ever question that I've chosen the Suns as my canvas? When you've crawled in my skin for three days, then you can question and/or criticize me. Until then, keep your blindfolded cheer leading to your corner closets. I'm working here.
To those who enjoy and appreciate the things I do in the name of Solar Redemption, thank you for your continued support.
There is no Planet. There is only A Clockwork.
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